We know how difficult it could be to wait for updates on pregnancy test result, especially when you are doing surrogacy. Here are some tips to help you to get through this challenge and stay sane while waiting for the results.
- There is nothing that you can or cannot do to influence the outcome. It is out of your control. Strong emotions, feelings of pessimism, and getting upset with yourself or others will not change the outcome. You may very well have mood swings, feelings of irritability, jealousy, or anxiety. While these are certainly stressful for you, rest assured that they will not change the outcome.
- Waiting for the pregnancy test can feel like a very, very long time. You have put tremendous effort and planning into this cycle. Don’t wake up tomorrow morning and think, “how am I going to get through the next few days?” Come up with a plan of things you can do to distract yourself, pamper yourself, and make the time go faster. You know yourself best. If getting a massage is right for you, then by all means go ahead. If seeing a lot of movies or focusing more of your efforts at work or getting to home projects on the “to do list” helps you get your mind off of the pregnancy test, then do these things.
- Allow yourself to be choosy regarding whom you spend time with. Feel free to avoid unsympathetic friends, overly fertile friends, and needy friends. Plan to see those who will support, entertain, and distract you. As Murphy’s Law would have it, baby showers seem to pop up at just this time. Feel free to avoid these if you feel they would be too stressful for you.
- Screen your phone calls! If you have told a number of people that you are undergoing fertility treatments, then you may be inundated with frequent phone calls. If this starts to get to you, appoint a spokesperson for yourself (best friend, relative, etc…). Tell everyone that if and when there is good news to share, you will certainly be in touch.
- Make a date with your partner for the night of your pregnancy test. If it is positive, it gives you a chance to celebrate. If the results are disappointing, it will give you time to grieve together away from friends and acquaintances, and plan the next step together.
- Although it can be hard, try to balance the fine line between your state of mind and reality. There is no right way to feel. For some, it is much easier to cope with the days of waiting by feeling hopeful and optimistic; for others it feels more comfortable to protect themselves be feeling pessimistic. One way to make it easier is to have a “Plan B’ just in case your pregnancy test is negative. Whatever your feelings and thoughts after a treatment, make sure that you have an appointment for a consultation with your doctor.